Set Apart for You

“I choose to be Holy, set apart for you Lord…” (from the song Refiner’s Fire by Brian Doerksen)

Brian Doerksen has it right. Set apart for you… not for good behavior. (although that’s a byproduct)

We often hear the phrase “set apart” and immediately think of morality.
Of striving.
Of avoiding sin.
Not doing bad things.

Holiness, in this view, becomes about separating from bad behavior—about being good, pure, blameless. “Holy”

But what if set apart was never meant to be legal?

What if it’s relational?

Think of a bride.
She leaves behind her old life—not just to follow rules, but to be joined to her bridegroom.
She takes on his name.
She gives herself wholly to him.
Not out of duty, but devotion.
She’s not just avoiding infidelity; she’s giving all of herself in love.
She has set herself apart.

This is the image Scripture uses again and again:
We are the bride. Jesus is the bridegroom.
This isn’t just a metaphor—it’s a reality.
He gave Himself for us. And we give ourselves to Him.

Holiness isn’t about separation from the world just for the sake of it.
It’s about being joined to Him. Set apart for Him.

Just as a groom lays down his life for his bride, Christ laid down His life for us.
And we mirror that—by laying our lives down in return. Not to earn love, but to respond to it.

We’ve often framed the cross through the lens of punishment—penal substitution, blood payment.
But what if it’s even deeper than that?
What if it’s about covenant? About relationship?

The whole arc of Scripture—wedding feasts, bridal imagery, covenant vows—whispers this truth:

God is not just set apart. God is relationship.

To be holy is to belong. To be known. To be His.

I long to be… actually, I am.
Already His.

Already Loved.