Until you can do this

I love telling stories and listening to them. If you spend any time with me, you'll quickly notice I often find an analogy to communicate something. Giving advice and trying to sound ‘wise’ through these newsletters is one thing, but sometimes you just need to hear stories. Stories of successes and failures, beginnings and endings, joys and pains, struggles and triumphs.

So, I think upcoming newsletter posts will focus on stories as much as possible. Occasionally, I might have something profound to say, but I believe the Lord has much to reveal as we observe and experience other people's narratives. I'll start by sharing some of my own.

One of the first times I remember saying that I wanted to lead worship was when a renowned worship leader came to Harare, Zimbabwe, where I lived. He was set to perform at a large church in town. Although I didn’t attend that church, I wanted to be part of it. They assembled a mass choir of 300-400 people to be on stage with this worship leader. Excitedly, I joined the rehearsals.

On the day of the show, I saw my position—literally in the wings, behind a curtain. You could only see me from a specific angle if you were really looking for me. I felt bummed out about being in such a hidden spot. But as I looked around at the choir risers and down at the worship leader, leading and singing, I knew I wanted to do that. "That is what I want to do"

At that moment, the Lord spoke to my heart: "Until you can do this, you can't do that." I think that meant being part of the body, part of the choir, in a hidden place without credit or attention. It was about serving from a place unseen because He knew while he was calling me, I had huge levels of immaturity—I probably wanted to be front and center for applause and attention.

After the concert, as people were leaving, I approached the worship leader, who was still on stage with his equipment. Offering to carry his stuff, hoping for a chance to talk or ask something meaningful, we rode up the elevator together in silence. When we reached his room, he thanked me briefly, and that was it.

I wasn’t overly disappointed; just excited to be around someone 'famous'. But that was one of the first times I realized I wanted to lead worship professionally. Though I'd been exposed to worship leading before, I'd never seen it at such a scale. I still have that vision in my heart - for better or worse.

This happened around '92 or '93—it's been a long journey since then. More stories will come.

Where did you start? When did you first say, "That's what I want to do"?

What were your circumstances? Reply - I'd love to hear your story.